Infertility in marriage; the odds are against the women

Infertility is defined as trying to get pregnant with consistent unprotected sexual intercourse for at least a year without success ( and at least six months for those above 35).

Infertility rate has increased globally, and about one – third of infertility problem is contributed by the men, also one – third by the female and one – third of these issues are caused by unknown factors. The WHO reports that eight to ten per cent of couples around the world deal with infertility cases.

In the African cultural setting, childbirth is an integral part of the ‘union between man and woman’. Most people become expectant and expect to see signs of pregnancy within one year of marriage, even people who have no business in this matter at all!

Infertility comes with a lot of problems such as stigma, marital problems, mental issues and violence. It is quite unfortunate that women bear the brunt of it all. In a cultural setting where a woman is considered worthless for the inability of her marriage to produce a child, the pressure of having one is on the woman.

Moh and her husband are not ready to have a child yet, but Moh is the one dealing with the pressure of artificial (suggested word – intentional) infertility.

She cannot discuss it with her mother. In just four months of marriage, her mother has taken her to over four places for herbs, prayer waters and blessings. Imagine if Moh and her husband cannot have a child truly!

Jes medically does not have any problems preventing her from getting pregnant likewise her husband. But Jes gets consistent calls from her mother and mothers-in-law so fast, she gets to take the herbs, constant visit to the hospital to get reassurance. Her husband seems unbothered but has episodes of anger.

The minimum requirement that will at least help you out of this dilemma is patient. You don’t have to tell the world you and your husband aren’t ready for kids or that you’re having issues conceiving as the case may be. We hope couples learn how to handle this situation with wisdom without losing it. 

Have you been in this scenario before and you were able to handle this, kindly share your views..